Why I’m Calling This My Soft Summer

& why I think you may want to as well

It’s the beginning of July and there is some part of me that already fears the end of summer. I’m a full time single mom and teacher by trade - when summer hits, it’s like a breath of fresh air after coming close to drowning.  Ever so quietly though, I hear that ticking time bomb tapping away in the background.

We live in a world where we are continuously rushing. Rushing to get up and out the door, rushing to complete the tasks of the work day, and rushing once back home to make it through dinner, bath and bedtime without losing our minds. Unintentionally, we continue the rush through what brings us joy as well, unhesitatingly refusing to take pause. 

And while summer allows a release from the chaos, the rush within lingers. 

Past summers had me at full force with a hefty list of things to accomplish. The pressure was on to make the most of the days of freedom ahead. I wanted the “Summer of Yes!” and tried my damned best to make it so by putting myself out there, agreeing to more nights out then I enjoy, and pushing myself beyond that sweet spot. 

Knowing I needed a shift, I began setting an intention at the beginning of each summer. I reflect on the energy I want to lean into and intentionally choose a word that best fits. Last summer my chosen word was play, and I dedicated my energy to being more playful. I moved more playfully throughout the summer - with friends, with my daughter, at yoga, and on dates... Anywhere I could add more fun and get more curious, I attempted to do so. 

This year I want something different. I have a hefty list of personal goals, and I still want a summer of Yes! But on my own terms and without the pressure. I want the yes to what feels in alignment and the yes to saying no to what doesn’t. I want to release the rush, slow down and lean into my own inner softness. 

This is all easier said than done - It’s easy to say be softer, quieter, and slower when solo. When there’s a little one demanding your every moment of attention? It takes more intentionality.

The last thing any of us need is another to-do list, so how do we lean into the softness? 

Personally, the first area I’m softening around is in the expectations. Taking a big page out of Mel Robbins Let Them Theory and attempting to detach from the outcomes I place on a pedestal in my head around the different areas of my life. I release them, even when it feels uncomfortable, and am practicing breathing through it. 

I’m leaning into softness around my nervous system. Giving myself grace to pause, acknowledge, and move slower through the moment at hand. I’m softening how I speak to myself. Far from perfect, I’m attempting to release the desire to be - even if just temporarily. 

And in my body? I’m softening there too by going slower, leaning back and only pushing myself when I feel aligned to. 

I’m softening in the silence. Attempting to connect within. 

Leaning into this softness takes time. It’s a step away from the rush and perfectionism society has forced upon us all. It’s a practice - one that we can all benefit from. So as you move quickly throughout your day, ask yourself -

Where can I slow down?

Where can I pause?

Where can I allow myself to soften within? 

Because it’s in the softness and stillness where we’re able to fully see the beauty within -  in ourselves and within each other.